Across the pond

So, this was the story as we crossed the pond, out of touch with the entire rest of the world, for two, very long weeks:

Day 1 without sat comms.  We all find ourselves occasionally reaching to check email, or Google some vital piece of triva, or trival piece of vita.  Seas are calm and its getting hotter as we head West by northwest, toward the equator.  The sea looks beautiful and somehow more expansive.

Day 2 without sat comms.  Fire drill today.  My job was to grab someone and police up two spare lengths of fire hose, a nozzle and a couple of hose wrenches.  Carrying a section and nozzle in one arm and the wrenches in my back pocket, I crossed the helideck to the bow and started down the stairs to the foc'sle deck, below.  I didn't make the first step.  They were slick with spray from the bow.  My feet shot out from under me and I rocketed down the stairs like I was shot out of a cannon.  I slid all the way out, flat out on the foc'sle.  The back of my head hitting each stair on the way down sounded like a machine gun-baseball knot back there, now.  The arm carrying the hose and nozzle smashed into the flat bar of the stair rail at the bottom, as I shot by.  Ripped open my wrist and it swelled up like an August tomato.  I've got bruises from the back of my head to my heels.  Back is shot to hell.

Day 3 without sat comms.  Took 45 minutes to get out of my rack and into a hot shower.  I am one sore mo fo.  Eating lots of pain pills and muscle relaxers.  Medic just shakes her head when she sees me.  I was damn lucky.  There is no medi-vac from this far out.  Still hurts like a bastard, though.  We are beginning preparations for the torture of 22 poor souls who have not yet become shellbacks. Looks like I am King Neptune, again and the Chief Nav, my comely (homely) wife.  He keeps nagging me for a new outfit for the ceremony.  I told him I'm not made of money and if he wants a new dress he better damn well make it himself.  After all, I've got to make my own crown, trident and braces for my wrists.  Lots of cardboard, tin foil and spray paint...I now needs me robes, belt and sandals.

Day 4, no sat comms, dammit.  System crashed.  Re-booted one of my servers and found out it was connected to the sat comms.  With no sat comms it hangs on WAN and I am dead in the water until sat comms are restored.  Found a beard for King Neptune.  Recycling Santa's kit...

Day 5, no freaking sat coms.  No system.  Lost samba connection to system.  Time for house-cleaning.  Drudge work.  Well, that took all of an hour.  Only like a week to go, dammit.

Day 6 of this crap.  Work on the UPS (uninterruptable power supply that powers critical systems in times of crisis) means shutting down my entire system.  With one server hung and one process inadvertantly shut down, I am not happy about the prospect.

Day fucking 7.  We're nearing the middle of the Atlantic.  I completely shut down my system, then spent 4 hours bringing it back online.  Nearly everything was restored and I am back in business, preparing for my upgrade.  Time to begin work on preparations for the ceremony.  I need a trident, crown, hair, big fucking mustache, beard, some sort of robes, cape.  Also have to set up some of the props and find myself a comfortable chair for a throne.  I'm not holding court on a work bench.

8.  Obtained a purple sarong from a Malaysian fellow.  Made hair, crown and trident.  Still need a damn cape and a throne...made a couple of tubs to dunk the pollywogs in.  Tomorrow is the ceremony.  Can you imagine swimming in a large vat of assorted juices, sauces, balsamic vinegar, cooking oil, grease, with a bucket of 4 day old food scraps mixed in?  I'm talking egg shells, veggies, rotten meat, prawns, etc?  The crap each pollywog must drink will be much the same..

Day 9.  Long day!  Started just after dwan, preparing tubs for them to be submerssed in, filled them with a horrible mixture of everything foul we could get our hands on.  Set everything up, put on out costumes and led the pollywogs through the ritual.  It was a blast. but once again, I was a very pasty white, partially clothed, King Neptune, venturing into the equatorial sun.  I'm totally sunburned and exhausted.  A few of us had to clean up after the ceremony, including washing the helideck with a fire hose and that just wore me out.

Day 10.  We are still in the middle of the Atlantic, though closer to Brazil, than anything.  We have detoured slightly to come alongside San Pedro Island-a tiny, largely unknown Island.  It is, as far as we know, uninhabited and desolate, but we'll see in just a few more hours.  Well.  During a drill where we moved around the ship, refreshing our knowledge of various fire-fighting and first-aid apparatus and techniques, we passed to the North of the Island, or Islands.  A motley collection of small rocks many hundreds of miles off the coast of Brazil.  We saw three, small boats, a lighthouse and a satellite dish.  No people.  Very small, maybe a half-dozen acres at best, all rock and sand, coral and beach.  Beautiful when viewed from the perpective of this rusty, old tub, but otherwise not much to look at.

Day 11  Nothing happening.  Internal audits, wandering around the ship, laundry and sweet boredom.

Day 12.  We're several hundred miles off the coast of South America, heading northwest past northern Brazil toward French Guayana and Suriname.  I'm reduced to filing old emails and wishing I had some laundry to do.  The weather has been unfailingly, hot and sunny with scattered clouds and fair seas. I see a lot of flying fish fleeing the bow wake.  Looking forward to working out tonight, as the past two nights have been my nights off.

Day 13.  Nothing.  Fuckall.

Day 14.  We received the codes for a new satellite, but nothing works.  I wonder about my family.  For all we know, WWIII has broken out, or the sun is about to go supernova.  We are all frustrated.

Day 15 Woo Hoo!  Sat comms are back.

This is Odyssey, signing off

This should be my last post before LOS when my satellite comms drop out for about a week.  We're currently steaming West in excess of 11 knots and as we leave the Angolan coast, we are also steaming out from under the footprint of the satellite I've been using to communicate with the outside world for the last 10 months.  Because this move to the other side of the world is decidedly, very last-minute, we won't get access to the next satellite for at least a week.  Paperwork, you know?  So, sometime next week, or early into yet the next, we'll pop back into communication with the rest of humanity and the World-Wide Web.

I walked out on a deck this morning to have a look around while draining my first cuppa joe.  It was dreary and grey.  Sea the color of blued steel, faded, like the barrel of my old rifle on a cold November morning.  Grey skies and the air so thick, you can see it.  It felt sad and lonely up there so I came back in, quickly.  I think it's likely just me, not looking forward to the loss of communication.  I'm going to miss calls with my wife, LP in the background yelling, "I love you!", to get out of actually having to talk with her father on the phone.  Going to miss the Internets, too and all you guys.

Well, this is it.  I'll see you all on the other side, hopefully about one week out of Trinidad. 

"Be safe and be happy today-tomorrow might be a real pisser."  -me, right now

"So long, Earth. Catch you on the flip side." -Jack Swigert at lunar LOS,  Apollo 13

Ear of the beholder

Kublai asks Marco, "When you return to the West, will you repeat to your people the same tales you tell me?"
"I speak and speak," Marco says, "but the listener retains only the words he is expecting. The description of the world
to which you lend a benevolent ear is one thing; the description that will go the rounds of the groups of stevedores and
gondoliers on the street outside my house the day of my return is another; and yet another, that which I might dictate
late in life, if I were taken prisoner by Genoese pirates and put in irons in the same cell with a writer of adventure
stories. It is not the voice that commands the story: it is the ear."
Invisible Cities – Italo Calvino, 1972

Correction: It might hurt a little...

So a quick Internets search gives me several options to calculating the optimal FAT BURN heart rate.  My elliptical machine was totally full of shit.  The correct rate is definitely above that of mine while sleeping and seems, in fact, to be a decent workout that I can feel after an hour.  I even get to sweat.

This won't hurt a bit...

So I started back on the elliptical machine.  It has a computer.  I choose FAT BURN.  I program in my height, weight and age and it tells me what I need to do to burn fat the most efficiently.  It tells me to lay down, close my eyes and relax.  Really.

From here to Bogota

Yesterday was a rare, good day.  After a lot of worrying about getting more work for my ship, we got a job.  It involves a nice, long steam across the pond, stops in Brazil and Trinidad and then finally, working in Columbia-somewhere I've yet to work.  The excitement spread throughout the crew and everyone seemed in a good mood.  Charts and maps were pulled out and poured over.  Stories were traded.  Everyone began to speculate on crew-x and whatnot.  Not a bad day at all.  I even began looking up flights from Cartegena and Bogota...

Today, reality sets in and the work begins.  The one thing that stands out is that by several accounts, including some famous guy who sailed around the world, is that we are going to work the roughest waters in the world.  It seems we had a ship nearly capsize there a few years ago.  I thought Argentina and South of New Zealand were the worst:(

Midnight wake up

Dead freaking tired this morning.  Was awoken at 1am by a phone call from PW.  Possible emergency so the adrenaline was pumping, big time.  Thankfully, it was not an emergency, but I ended up emailing back and forth with my oldest daughter for an hour.  After that I couldn't sleep. Too keyed up from the possibility that something bad happened to my family.  Out here, you cannot help but be painfully aware that you are 12,000 miles and several days away from home no matter what happens and that if you have to DO anything, you only have a phone and email at your disposal.  Even after 12 years, it's scary and frustrating and stressful.

Anyway, I'm just thankful that everyone is safe and well. The mood onboard is tinged with hope.  The market is in pretty bad shape and we were looking at an extended period with no work, but it looks like we have a good shot at work in Brazil and relatively soon (few months).  Right now any work is good, but Brazil is an added bonus, especially for me-it would get me back to the western hemisphere for the first time in years...

Ciao

Sleepy

Sleepy today.  Took a muscle relaxer last night before bed and I cannot seem to fully wake up this morning.  Weather is overcast and cool, very nice for Africa.  Still working on getting out of Angola and down to Namibia.  Latest rumor is that we might pick up some work in Brazil.  Beats West Africa by a mile, but it would take us a few weeks to steam across the Atlantic...

Health care reform alternatives

Found this to be interesting, informative and thought-provoking.  Got it from an Adam Savage tweet this morning.  I don't stand too far away from most of his views, actually.  I think Mr. Mackay has presented a few common-sense, low-cost/no-cost solutions to some (not all) of the problems with our current health care system-inexpensive, largely painless alternatives to a (potentially) bureaucracy-bloated, government-controlled, mess. As for the end of his column, I have no plans to give up my red meat, chili dogs and twinkies for granola.

"...and I shall grind whatever grist the mill requires"

Another day in paradise.  Paperwork, computer maintenance are the tasks of the day.  Wishing we would head for Namibia, but we still have some testing and gear retrieval to accomplish, first.

***

Came across a website dedicated to one of my favorite authors.  The author is a regular, DAILY, participant on the discussion boards!  I cannot convey in words what a delight this is!!  Many of the books I read are of the world-building, sci-fi genre, where the reader is required to invest more than bit of grey matter in order to understand the underlying physics and natural laws that govern the universe the story is set in.  The particular series I'm talking about is so well-written that in addition to the time and thought invested in understanding the universe, I've found myself emotionally invested in the characters, over the years and I've been reading this series for over 10 years (15 books, 7500 pages worth).  What a treat it is to have 10 years of questions, now answerable.  Post a question and the author usually responds in a day, or two.  That kind of dedication to your fans is pretty much unheard of, especially from an author of over 50 novels . I am pleased as punch:)

***

The thyme-scented coffee makes me gag in the morning...

Parsley Sage Rosemary and Folgers

My day starts bad.  I wake up 3 hours after my shift begins.  Bad. Bad. Bad.

I go for coffee.  Open the cupboard where the instant coffee and fixins are and it smells like spaghetti, or something...

Make coffee, take Malarone and head out back for a smoke.  Take a drink of my coffee and it smells strongly like pizza, or spaghetti...
Back to the cupboard, I start digging around and....the makeshift sugar jar WAS a jar of THYME, now used for sugar.  Good Times.

Tired and grumpy

Another day in paradise.  Woke up exhausted and I've been onboard less than a week.  This place saps the energy out of you at first, due to your body fighting the constant rocking of the boat and the pressure of the job that ramps up as soon as your opposite departs on crew-x day.  Thank god for coffee, as the Malarone I'm taking for malaria is also wiping me out and giving me nightmares all night.  Malarone, coffee and a smoke-breakfast of champions!

***

Yesterday, the sat comms began to noticeably deteriorate.  They are shit, now.   I've been able to get through checking, replying to email and Twitter and managed to read most of the my usual blogs in Google Reader, but it took hours.  Still working on communications to and from the office.  Priorities.

***

Was thinking today that I'm supposed to be a geophysicist-one of those geeks who sits at a desk fiddling with his pocket protector.  As someone mentioned to me the other day, I'm the exception to every rule.  Instead of a pocket protector in my button down shirt, I'm sitting here in bright orange work pants and ratty T-shirt with a six-inch boat knife strapped to my leg.  I'm prepared to gut my computer like a fish if it gives me the slightest error.  I'm contemplating taking a break from the chair to head out back and strip barnacles from the in-sea gear with a heavy rope and my trusty knife.  Later this week I start getting re-certified in crane operations, rigging and slinging.  Swinging 20-ton loads around with a 60 ft crane on a rolling, pitching ship is....interesting, I guess you could say.  Next month I head off to get re-certified in HUET and prepare myself to get out of a helicopter after it crashes into the sea, flips upside-down and sinks underwater.  That and FIRE fighting.  I loves me some fire. 

Anyway, I'm feeling very reflective and wondering how I ended up out here in such a weird fucking job.  All I ever wanted to do in life was genetically modify humans, go into space, or pound on rocks with a hammer-not this shit.  I'm not complaining, mind you, just wondering how fate managed to dump me out here off the coast of West Africa instead of a regular, 9-5 existence.  My only real complaint is that I miss my wife and children and friends, terribly.  OK, maybe also the sometimes really shitty food, or the fact that I can't drink milk for 7 months/year.  Some green vegetables that aren't brown would be nice once in a while, too.

Still, as Tony Robbin's tweet today says "When the heart grieves over what it has lost, the spirit rejoices over what it has left." - Sufi quote.  My spirit rejoices in the fact that I have a job at all, in these tough times.  I hope you all are healthy, happy and at peace on this fine day.

Musical Statistics

Adding some tags, loves and tracks to my Last.fm library (all 49 pages of the shit) and I end up wasting time, cruising my musical neighbor's sites for tracks to steal.  At one site, I find a group and on their discussion board a post links this.  Funny. Shit.

Still wrapping up things here in (off of ) Angola.  Deleting 10 months of work off  the system is seriously depressing, though.  All that work, one click and *poof* its gone:(

The crane is working overtime, right over my head.  Hard to concentrate with the freaking howling of the hydraulics.  Got my music turned up LOUD and its just not helping.

This trip there was one other American onboard.  She's leaving today, leaving me as the resident Yank.  Things are going to get tougher.

Finally, the British Chief Mechanic on here brought me back a book he picked up years ago, oddly, when he was passing through the states.  Its about a corporate manger-type who goes to the big house for manslaughter and chronicles his time in the joint.  Its dark and funny and twisted and I highly recommend it after reading the first 237 pages non-stop last night till 1am.  Go get yerself some "You Got Nothing Coming"

Even more odd is that my opposite, who is also British, also just left me a book in the cabin we both occupy.  Its also about a guy who does time in prison, but in Thailand, for drugs.  I'm suddenly wondering what these British guys think of me...I mean, I haven't seen the inside of a cell in fucking years, dawgs.

Fine drinking establishments around the world

Screwing around in FB today. Noticed I've been to 402 cities in 35 countries. I've been freaking everywhere, seen nothing, done nothing but fly in, eat, sleep, and drink in bars, then fly out. Been to some damn fine bars, though...

Speaking of that, I am reminded of this little place next to a dirt airstrip in the jungles of Myanmar that I stopped in for a coffee and a cheroot, in hopes of toning down a bastard of hangover. They gave me shots of some sort of home-made hooch that you drink out of a large insect shell. Made me sort of not right in the head, like a .45 caliber slug. Not that drinking in the jungle at 6am is going to set things right in yer noggin...

And so I wonder. Do you know what a cheroot is? Cheroot is one of the distinctive icons of Myanmar. These cigars are made with a blend of tobacco and fragrant wood chips, then rolled up using a dried green leaf called the 'tha nat phet'. After adding a filter made of corn husks, the cheroot is ready to rock. They are mostly handmade by women in the Inle Lake region, but can be found everywhere in the country. I certainly had no trouble bumming one off of any local I met. They are by far the most wonderful smoke that doesn't alter your brain chemistry that I've ever had the pleasure of.

And I have missed them, terribly, ever since leaving Yangon in a panic, where I think the small handfull I had were taken by some soldiers who wanted to use me as their very own American-made punching bag. That, or I dropped them in my rush to get out of their makeshift boxing gym. I remember asking everyone I met in Suvarnabhumi Airport ( I escaped Myanmar to Bangkok) for one, but none were to be found. A girl in the airport massage parlour (legitimate! I had back issues!) gave me a little Chinese cigar from a wooden box, but it wouldn't smoke because of these little, round holes in the leaf wrapping. She told me they were worm holes...

Welcome to the jungle

Some days I really love my job.  Not often, but some days it's like juggling.  I throw up 15-20 tasks and bang out 2-3 minutes on each one before it hits the ground, non-stop for 12-15 hours and then another day has passed in the blink of an eye. Today started like the beginning of the GnR song Welcome to the Jungle, with Axl screaming.  The shit just ramped up to fever pitch in like 30 seconds when I walked into my office and I was off like a fucking rocket.  I wish I could shoot up a load of java instead of having to stop to drink.  I've begun the prep work for upgrading my computer system.  Its going to be one big, bad motherfucker in about 2 1/2 more weeks.  If it works, anyway.   You know where you are?  You're in the jungle, baby.  You're gonnna die....

/offtoburnupsomeenergyonthebackdeckinthehotafricansun

To burp or not to burp

My beloved cooks made me a pepperoni and onion pizza tonight.  Sadly, they had no mushrooms, but the za was perfection.  Ate seven large pieces.  Having trouble breathing.  Walking is out of the question.  Burping is good.  Wishing I could pass gas.  "Just one thin mint..."  

Somebody call 911@foodcoma.com

Time for the leaving...

So, next up for The Pirate's ship is Walvis Bay, Namibia.  Extended port call and drinks all around.  I'll be off the coast of Angola for another week, then clear the country and a few days steam to Walvis Bay.  A lot of work to do between here and there, remains though.  Deploying, testing and retrieving gear, final reports, shipments, repairs and all that rot, but it feels damn good to be leaving Angola behind.  Its been 10 long months here and none of it has been pleasant.

Here we go again

Slightly more than half way through the commute.  I had decent flights to Luanda this time.  Spent most of a nine-hour layover in London Heathrow at the Yotel.  Luxuriated in fours sleep and two showers.  Had a great seat on the plane to Luanda.  Arrived at 4am, spent 3 hours in the immigration cage, an hour in an office across the street from the airport and I'm now in the cage at the quay.  We're waiting for some sort of food in a box and for our supply boat to dock.  Looking forward to a 20-hour steam out to the prospect and my ship.  Word is that we are nearly done here in Angola and will be steaming to Nambibia, soon, where we'll spend time drinking before heading home, again. 

Luanda is much the same as I left it.  Dirt, dust, crumbling adobe and mud bricks.  Tin held down by debris and small children sitting in the dirt playing with garbage.  Stray dogs and traffic jams.  Soldiers and women carrying goods on their heads.  I will not be sorry to leave this place.

***
Made it to the ship.  Spent a total of 6 hours between the airport immigration lounge and the cage on the docks.  Overnight we steamed to the prospect and I actually strung together 8 hours sleep before and after dinner. At one point, I began to dream that somebody was in trouble...I could hear them yelling "help me!" as if from a great distance, a faint calling.  Slowly, I woke up.  I could still hear him.  "Help me."  "Please help me."   "Its hot in here."   W.T.F?   I could hear one of the crew pleading for help.  I sat up and looked around the darkened metal container I was sharing with eight other guys.  Suddenly, I hear the captain in the bunk below roll over and swear.  He gets out and starts giving the unseen chap in distress a rash of shit.  Turns out one of the crew had locked himself in the containers makeshift bathroom and could not get out.  He was slowly baking to death inside there.  For the next 20 minutes I lay in my bunk, pissing myself laughing as they tried to extricate him.  Eventually, they had to tear the door down to get him out.  The poor guy emerged in his boxers and socks, dripping with sweat and still looking more than slightly panicked. I drifted back off to sleep, still chuckling.

Later, not long after I woke, showered and sat out on the back deck, evidently another crew member did the same thing and once again the door had to be removed to get him out.  Good times.

Anyway, we eventually reached the prospect and my ship, took a short ride over in the jet boat and after a short handover, I headed out on the back deck to deploy gear where I got a decent workout, barnacle juice in my eye and then shuffled off to sauna and to sleep the sleep of the dead.

I woke up for my first full shift a full hour late this morning.  Not good.  Mucho java before I head back out on deck and start playing with winches and reels and tensions measured in tens of tons.

Swing and a miss...

As usual, the combination of office pukes and Angolan Immigration have managed to screw up crew-x.  I'm still home...

Sitting at the dining room table drinking coffee on my last full day at home. I head for Angola tomorrow.  It's a beautiful morning and I can hear my girls talking and giggling upstairs, still in bed.  Number one son is still passed out cold.   All I have to do is pack, charge batteries, get a haircut, book a Yotel cabin at London Heathrow, print my travel documents and take care of a few loose ends around the house. 

Leaving on a jet plane...

Just found out I am not leaving for Africa in 4 days.  I'm leaving tomorrow morning due to visa issues:(

Summer vacation and winter wood

Yep. I've been busy. After a few days home, spent sleeping and fishing we packed up LP and the mutt and drove down to my FIL's cabin on a small lake. We then spent another week fishing, sleeping and eating like royalty. Man, the food is really, really good down there. The fishing was also great, if you were LP. Her and I went out every day in a little paddle boat. I typically caught 2-3 fish to her 25. She caught the biggest damn perch I've ever seen-a 14" master angler freaking perch. It would've looked nice mounted between the 12" crappie and the 10" bluegill she also caught.

We made it back home on Sunday night and did absolutely nothing on Monday, but the last two days I've been putting up firewood for the winter. I've got 4 full cords cut, split and stacked in the woodshed, alongside my driveway, in the basement racks and the rack in the living room is half full. The only thing left to do is split a little kindling and I'm ready for the snow.

Now, if my back recovers before I have to fly out in a week, I'll be a happy man.

Summer fun

One of the downsides to my piracy career is that often I miss a season, or get very little of it.  Such is the case with this summer.  I've three weeks now and then it's over for me.  With motivation like that, I woke LP early yesterday.  Fed her a hearty breakfast, dressed her warm and off we went for an early morning fish.  We started on one of our favorite streams to hike.  It has a wooden boardwalk on both sides, as it winds lazily through a slough, into the big canal that divides the two biggest towns in this area. Its also dotted with several fishing stations and benches along the way, but in the end, despite the beauty of the river and the comfort of the boardwalk, it remains a fall salmon river only, unless you hike way up into the headwaters to hunt for brookies. 

We left and hit another favorite spot, this time a favorite for fishing. A small, wooded point on the canal, it's right in town, but nearly always deserted and boasts a 24 ft drop-off.  We drifted worms and pieces of hotdog, but the wind and current were against us.  Hiking back to the car, LP found a nice piece of float copper.  After a quick lunch, we next fished a long, wooden dock on the canal right in front of Mr. Budd's house.  LP had all the luck and I had a wonderful time watching her.

Instead of going home in the afternoon, LP wanted to go four-wheeling.  We drove out into the bush and I gave LP the wheel.  She loves to drive and especially in the mud.  She drove us all over the woods, finding every single mud bog in the forest.  We also stopped at our favorite wilderness lakes, saw a timberdoodle, deer and some ducks.  After LP took a year, or two off the life of the truck, we limped home and I stayed pretty close to the couch for the rest of the evening. 

Finally, that other summer tradition, ticks.  Got a big, hairy bastard trying to suck me dry right through my kneecap.  Smothered him in vasoline and scraped him off a few minutes later.  Ticks.

The trip home

Almost home.  I've made it to Atlanta.  It's been 50 hours since I left my ship, since I slept.  The trip started out badly when my backpack and laptop got soaked during the jet boat ride over to the supply ship.  I didn't find out until the next morning, as it was only wet on the bottom, but during the night it soaked up through everything.  I emptied my bag and laid everything out at the entrance to the engine room, where 120-degree air constantly blows up from a stairwell, and it all dried pretty quickly. This is the first time I've powered up the laptop and it works (knock wood).  The ride into Luanda, Angola took about 20 hours.  Spent most of the time reading, watching movies or bullshitting with a guy from one of the other boats in the operation.  I haven't seen him since we worked together up in Alaska a few years ago, which coincidentally, was the start of my original blog, Life of a Pirate. 

I should note that on that ship we live in a metal box, or container, strapped down on the back deck.  From living in the box, we moved into the cage on the dock in Luanda.  This time we literally walked in and right back out of the cage, which was a treat. Any day not in the cage is a good one.  We took a bus up the bluff to the airport.  Our driver was obviously paid by the mile.  our navigators reckoned we drove a star pattern, taking us to each corner of  the city along the way.

Our handlers efficiently shuffled us through to ticketing and then promptly split.  Running the gauntlet of security, customs, immigration and the Quanza Man (TM) is simply a major fucking drag.  Everyone you encounter except the Quanza Man (TM) likes to stare at you and do nothing.  Just stare. I think they look for a reaction to see if you're running late, then they stare longer while you sweat and fidget.  I smile a lot and try hard to fart.  That is usually a very effective buzzkill that immediately gets you shuffled to the next official.

So, I farted at customs, passed gas at immigration and managed security without the need for flatulence and then had to face the Quanza Man (TM).

Quanza Man (TM) is unique in my experience and he has one of the best jobs in the world.  He is paid to steal your money, if he can.  Thats it.  You have to enter his office and he tries to steal your money.   I was out of gas by the time I got to his office and well, it doesn't work on him, anyway.  You see, he wears a rubber glove to work.  Yep.  He'll find that cash even if you've keistered it.  And this is what happens:  Quanza man holds up a rubber-gloved finger and asks you if you have any Quanza (local currency).  I say no.  He asks again, wiggling the finger, looking for a sign of weakness.  I say no, I work on a ship-no Quanza.  Then he demands US dollars.  I say I have none.  He then demands all my money.  I say no.  He says give me your US dollars and I lean forward, say no and stare into his dead eyes.  We stay locked like this for at least a full minute as he waits for me to break.  I don't and he tells me to get out.

It happens this way every time I'm confronted by Quanza Man (TM).  For others, it goes differently and mostly a bit tougher.  He is, after all wearing a rubber glove and he's not afraid to use it.  Mostly, he gets people to open their wallets, turn out their pockets, or open their carry-ons.  If you're weak enough to agree, he'll take any currency he finds and stuff it in his pocket, unless you raise all holy hell.  He's hard to stop once he sees your money, which is why I simply stare him down and say no to whatever he demands.  This time he manged to get one guy to open a wallet that had at least ten different currencies and they spent some long minutes yelling about it.  I tell you, I wish I had that fucker's job.

Anyway, I went to the bar, slammed 6 beers in 20 minutes and flew the fuck outta there.  Had a couple hours layover in Johannesburg, South Africa.  Hit the lounge for a while, then had a decent Malaysian curry with a couple of my shipmates from the Philippines.  The flight from Jo'burg was 16 hours.  Man, I hate those long ones.  I start to question my sanity after about 12 hours and start talking to myself soon after that.

Atlanta is a decent airport, overlooking the long trek to the main terminal, and a place where you can smoke.  Met a lot of soldiers.  They are everywhere in here and it's simply impossible to say hello, welcome them back, or wish them luck and thank them for their service.  It would be a full time job for like an army of people.  Anyway, I thanked as many as I could while waiting in line for security and whatnot.

Now its off to my next flight and Minnie...only two more to go!

UPDATE:  I'm home, recovering pretty well and heading out to see the new Harry Potter movie with all 3 of my kids!!

In which I exit stage left

Up with the dawn patrol this morning.  The sea was black as the sun popped up over the horizon.  Managed to eat a few bites of breakfast and dutifully took my Malarone to ward of the evil malaria.  I'm a little tired, but ready to get the hell off here in another 4 hours, or so.  Stayed up kind of late last night doing laundry and watching a little British telly with the gun chief.  We spent a few hours trading stories and talking about the old days in this business.

Anyway, the seas are calm, my supply ship's ETA is 1100 hrs.  Jet boat is fueled up and we are ready to rock. 

I'll see all you cats on the beach, Tuesday.

Web cam

So I'm sitting out here slightly bored, whiling away the last hour of my last full shift.  I only have a short 5-6 hours to cover tomorrow morning, before crew-x.  I'm surfing the web and come across a website in my bookmarks I haven't seen in a while and remember that it has a web cam only a mile or so from my house.  Called up PW and LP and asked them to stop at the cam on their way into town.  You can walk right up to this one.   They did and I got to see them on the web cam:)  Nice treat to be able to see them when I'm 12,000 miles away and hundreds of miles offshore. It also makes a nice wallpaper for the computer as I spend my last hours onboard.  I guess I'll throw up an update tomorrow morning, but for now...time to sauna, do laundry, pack and try to catch a few hours sleep before the long journey home.  You all have a great day, a wonderful weekend and if you happen to be in the Copper Country, I'll see you soon.

Flag Dispute

Found this to be interesting.  According to my admittedly feeble knowledge of law and tradition and the principles this country was founded on, I think this veteran was within his rights and further has earned the right to signal his distress by flying his flag upside down, having offered his life to defend it. 

It is, in some ways, a tough nut, in that we founded this country on the belief that people have the right to offend each other, but there it is.  Living under the flag gives you the right to burn it in protest, if you're so inclined.  It is exactly that basic freedom that makes us who we are as a nation and a people and not a bunch of poor schmucks living under a King, or much, much worse.

 I think the Marinette County District Attorney might need to pull his head out of his ass, especially after citing that it's illegal to cause a disruption as any decent lawyer could tear his ass apart in court for trying to portray a difference of opinion as a disruption (I see no mention of people rioting in the streets over this).  Whatever, it was an interesting story and not all that far from home, either.

Happy Birthday Nicky!

For those who find enjoyment in learning why things are, today is Nikola Tesla's Brithday!  He was born in Serbia, contributed to the scientific world like few others, in the fields of electromagnetics, robotics, radar, nuclear physics, ballistics and many others.  The SI unit of magnetic measure (actually the measure of magnetic flux density ), the Tesla, is named after him.  My favorite Tesla fact is that he calculated the resonant frequency of the Earth (~8Hz).  Happy b-day Nicky.

The distance from here to there

Crew-x is right around the corner, only 72 hours hence. Doing a bit of rough navigation, I've calculated the Great Circle routes home.

From Luanda, Angola
Latitude: 8° 50' 17" S
Longitude: 13° 14' 3" E

to Johannesburg, South Africa
Latitude: 26° 12' 0" S
Longitude: 28° 5' -1" E

That's 1,339 miles, or 2,480 Km.

Then northwest from there to Houghton, Mi
Latitude: 47° 7' 19" N
Longitude: 88° 34' 8" W

For another 8,750 miles, or 14,081 Km.

Adding up the two gives me a grand total commute of 10,089 miles, or 16,561 Km, as the crow flies.

This time around, I've got excellent flights and layovers which should put me at about 29 hours total flying time, plus a 24 hour boat ride into Luanda and half a day clearing customs and immigration. All in all, not a bad commute home as long as I can avoid rush hour traffic...

Better to be pissed off than pissed on

Stunning news, just "leaked" to the public.  Current energy suppliers will be "pissed", as demand for their contributions to the energy "stream" diminishes.
"Yer in" for some big changes when pee power hits the market, putting the oil and coal industries.... in the toilet.

Kill them all

I think I might have possibly mentioned in the past that I get upset with the majority of fellow fliers not following the carry-on baggage rules and observing some sort of respect of others when loading their bags in the overhead bins.  Well, if it takes big brother, then that's what it takes.

As many miles of wire as the Q house...

Dude!  They're going to bulldoze the Bevatron!

And that's all she wrote, folks...

Just watched Nigeria kick the crap out of France in our first annual ping-pong tournament.  Watching, I realized I'm not even on the same planet with these guys.  It was hard to even follow the ball at times.  It was an awesome game and fun to have most of the crew together to watch it happen.  Back to work...

More of a Pirate's miscellany

Woke up tired today.  Exhaustion from the 12-18 every day is starting to set in.  Drinking coffee, non-stop, from wake up till I hit the rack.  That's usually a good sign that it's time to get off the ship-anything over, say, 30 cups/day.  Five hours in and I'm on cup 9...

Found Buzz Aldrin on Twitter today.  Didn't know he did a rap video with Snoop??  Also, decided to follow Obama for a while, sort of a morbid curiosity thing, you know?  Also Noted Danny Evans (The Almighty Dad Gone Mad) decided to follow me, yesterday.   If you Tweet, go check out my followers, followees.  Maybe you'll find somebody new and worthwhile...

Food quality has been going way up and WAY down, lately.  I've been eating mostly salads, anyway.  Freaking fresh veggies on the ship, here in West Africa, are like crack! 


Ripped open the side of my foot trying to get out of my bathroom in rough seas.  Cannot find what actually sliced my foot open (down the entire side, from little toe to heal!).  On top of something unknown, lurking in the shadows, waiting to rip open my other foot, the wound looks to be infected.  Red lines running up your leg are a bad thing, no?

Was informed that one of our small boats on another ship had an accident and capsized, with the guys bailing out into the sea.  Hate to hear things like this, but at least they all survived and we can learn a few lessons from it.  It's a vivid reminder that what we do out here can seem like a just the daily grind, but is, in reality, extremely dangerous.  The dangers of fire, explosion, crushing, dismemberment, drowning, sharks, etc., are all around us out here, yet you sometimes tend to loose the sense of immediacy when dealing with them on a day-to-day basis.  Reminders are a good thing.

Still waiting to find out where I'm going next.  I'm really hoping for Peru, or Madagascar and NOT waiting around for more Angola, late in the year, though that will most likely happen no matter where I go in the interim.

Whatever the case, I'm outta here in 5 more days and outta Angola in 6...God willing the creek don't rise.

Peace

Seismic Week

It's Seismic Week, at least on Discovery Channel's website.  The purpose is to recognize all things seismic, including me (of course) and the annual meeting of the Seismological Society of America.  Go check it out, you'll be amazed at what is down there, trust me.

Mohan alert!

"Iran's Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khomeini warned Western countries on Monday against interfering in Iranian affairs after its disputed presidential election, state television reported." 

Guy just doesn't fucking get it, does he?  I think somebody needs to tell him we don't need to meddle-his own fucking people are rioting...as LP would say - 

"Mohan"

Movie of the week

Minutes after I rolled out of the rack this morning, I got the call to go out filming.  Had to turn up with my first mug of coffee and drink it on the way back to the gear.  It was a glorious morning, sun just up and shining brightly.  The seas were calm, with a gentle, long-period swell and no chop.  Copped a smoke, drank coffee on the leisurely ride back to the gear, where we filmed, underwater, for about an hour.  I played the part of producer and tried my best to keep the director in line, but he spent the better part of an hour giving the cameraman and key grip a ton of shit. Freaking directors.   Still, all in all it was a great trip, an escape from the ship and work and everything.  Good times.

FOOD

Fresh fruits and veggies from the supply ship!  Huge salad, carrots, broccoli and cukes.  Heaven.  Also had some sort of pastry with a mango yogurt topping.  Very yummy.  I love supply ships:)

A Pirate's Miscellany

I think I forgot to mention I saw a bunch of whales the other day; mother and calf and a few stray bulls shadowing us.  Sperm whales from their distinctive, one-blow hole, 45 degree blow.

Today, a pack of dolphins were hunting off our port bow.  From the look of the panicked little dudes, the tuna were the object of the hunt.  They were all trying to make like flying fish, with little, or no success.

The weather here is really hot today. Like Africa hot, oddly enough.

My crew-x "limo" is alongside right now.  I was just out doing laps on the heli-deck and boy oh boy, did it look inviting.  Wish today was next Sunday and I was getting on that fucker and heading for the beach.

Watched the first half of LOTR: Fellowship of the Ring last night.  The file came from someone on the crew from outside the US and again, there were a ton of scenes new to me.  This time, it did tend to add to the story a bit (possibly unlike the difference between The Professional and Leon).

Still reading A Short History of Nearly Everything.  What a delightful book!  He pops in and out of each science as needed to tell the tale of everything, and we've just dropped back in to visit Geology and the fact that Yellowstone is one, giant caldera, ready to obliterate humans from the face of North America.  Very cool.

That's all the Sunday News from West Africa that's fit to print.  Peter Frampton has just replaced Gloria Gaynor on my laptop and the young Indonesian working next me is seriously considering taking a fire axe to the side of my head over the strange music I play 18 hrs/day.  Ya'll have a great day.  Be cool and stay in school.

"You have the right to remain glazed..."

Concerned cops help keep the donuts flowing.

HAPPY 4th!

Happy 4th of July everyone!  I hope you are all BBQ'ing, drinking too much and blowing each other up with highly explosive fireworks.  Well, that's what I would be doing if I wasn't floating some 250 miles off the coast of Angola, right now...

My celebration consisted of the following:
1.  Improvised tea party, where I waved a little, home-made American flag and dumped 3 Tetley tea bags overboard. 
2.  Teasing the Brits onboard, mercilessly.
3.  Read both the Declaration of Independence and the U.S. Constitution, online.  (Forgot to bring my pocket book versions!)

I sincerely hope you all have a great 4th of July and a wonderful weekend.

Stromtroopers coming, you better beware...

So. The big thing onboard this morning has been the Myers-Briggs personality test. My corporation uses it in one of our management courses and we just downloaded it. Somebody made a huge banner of the 16 personality-type matrix. Now we are all taking the test and putting our names in the appropriate personality square. It's been interesting to see where we all fall and more so to read the individual personality inventory/assessments. I find a mixture of truth and fiction in mine, though some seem to have been nailed to the wall by the test. The results of my test? It says I'm an ISTJ-type guy. Some notable ISTJ's include 8 US presidents; Washington, Harrison, G. Bush Sr., and Andrew Johnson. Others; investor Warren Buffet, former Detroit Tigers manager Sparky Anderson and my personal favorite Darth Freaking Vadar. "I am your father, Luke." Also; Torquemada(one of the leaders of the Spanish Inquisition), and Yuri Andropov.

The full description of my personality varies from the results of my actual test:

Serious, quiet, earn success by concentration and thoroughness. Practical, orderly, matter-of-fact, logical, realistic, and dependable. See to it that everything is well-organized. Take responsibility. Make up your own mind as to what should be accomplished and work toward it steadily, regardless of protests or distractions. You relate more easily to the inner world of ideas than to the outer world of people and things. You like quiet for concentration, tend to be careful with details, dislike sweeping statements, have trouble remembering names and faces, dislike telephone intrusions and interruptions, work contentedly alone, have some problems communicating. You would rather work with known facts than look for new possibilities and relationships. You dislike new problems unless there are standard ways to solve them, like an established way of doing things, enjoy using skills already learned more than learning new ones, seldom make errors of fact, tend to be good at precise work, are patient with routine details. You base your judgments more on impersonal analysis and logic than on personal values. You do not show emotion readily and are often uncomfortable dealing with people's feelings, may hurt people's feelings without knowing it, like analysis and putting things into logical order, tend to decide impersonally sometimes paying insufficient attention to people's wishes, are able to reprimand people or fire them when necessary. You like a planned, decided orderly way of life better than a flexible, spontaneous way. You work best when you can plan your work and follow the plan, like to get things settled and finished, may decide things too quickly, may dislike to interrupt the project you are on for a more urgent one. * * * Some Vocational Implications Of Your Personality Preferences * * * You focus your attention on facts and handle them with impersonal analysis, thus you tend to become practical and matter-of-fact and find scope for your abilities in technical skills with facts and objects. For example: Applied science, business, production, construction

I see a lot of truth in here. I dislike interruptions, I am fascinated by ideas and learning and I think I may tend to hurt people's feelings without knowing it. My work is an applied science, doing production of a sort and I also worked in construction for 15 years.

To the online description I found on a Meyers-Briggs website:
The Thought Police

ISTJs are characterized by loyalty, duty, and civic responsibility. As an ISTJ, you have a natural understanding of the value of civil harmony and order, and a deep-seated dislike of non-conformity, anarchy, and chaos.

For an ISTJ, work is very important to a sense of self-satisfaction. Happiness comes most easily for you when you have a job that allows you to express your ethic. Whether it's blasting traitorous rebel scum as a proud Imperial Stormtrooper or monitoring the population's cerebral implants searching for evidence of unauthorized thought patterns as one of the Thought Police, you're most satisfied when you are crushing the population beneath the iron boot heel of oppression on behalf of your masters.

RECREATION; ISTJs approach leisure with the same dedication they bring to spreading tyrrany and oppression. Common ISTJ pasttimes include cleaning their rifles, improving their marksmanship, betting on political dissidents in the Gladiator Arena, and macrame.

COMPATIBILITY: ISTJs are capable of stong emotional connections, bonding closely with the other ISTJs in their unit, platoon, or sector.

All I have to say about this characterization is that while I do thoroughly enjoy cleaning my rifle and improving my marksmanship, I do not engage in macrame.

Well, now you know more than you ever wanted, or needed to know about me. If you're curious where you test out, try the following link: Meyers-Briggs.

All things A-Twitter

Ripped from one of Adam Savage's Tweets.  The top-10 ironic ads from history.  Irony abounds.

On that note, I'm now following the narrator and a MythBusters writer, but I'm not yet sure why...I also, somehow dropped Grant Imahara for a while, but just rectified the problem.  My daughter and I loves us some MythBusters!

Although I cannot fathom why, if you'd like to follow me on Twitter....I'm here.

End of days

Things are heating up.  Crew-x is less than 10 days away.   End of trip paperwork is piling up, people freaking out over crew-x logistics, canceled flights, etc.  Good times.  There's also a few minor annoyances such as water condensate dripping from the A/C units, everywhere.  Buckets in doorways, on couches and whatnot. 

***

To top it off, the smell of our diesel fuel is permeating the ship.  We're draining and venting one of the big fuel tanks and there is simply no way to avoid the smell.  Personally, I'm happy with it.  I happen to love the smell of gasoline and diesel.  Yeah, I know it's weird, but when I wake up and smell that fuel, it's like manna from heaven.

****

We've got satellite TV onboard.  I don't watch it, except when I pop in to the proper smoking lounge for a quick smokey treat (usually, I head out on the back deck).  Last night I popped in there and actually flipped through the channels.  We get one news channel.  Al Jazeera.  One movie channel. Sky? I think. One sports channel that shows cricket and football (that shit they play in Europe, not Oklahoma).   And finally, the UK version of Discovery.  Rather slim pickings for the boys. 

*****

I'm glad I'm a reader and not a TV watcher.
Note: Reading A short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson.  It is wonderful; packed with science, history, betrayal, murder and a guy who thought he could turn his pee into gold and did, in fact, just that (sort of).  Bill takes his readers on an extraordinary journey to discover and understand everything around us and in my opinion, succedes with style, grace and healthy dollup of irony.  I would consider it a must-read for everyone, but especially Blondie, LL and Mr. Budd.  (Dear Mr. Budd, I would bring it home for you but I took it in the sauna too many times and it fell apart.)

******

However, I do occasionally watch a movie on my laptop and I just watched the European version of The "Professional", called "LEON".  Their version is like 30 minutes longer.  In this one, Mathilda is shown accompanying Leon to meet Big Tony, and on several hits, learning how to kill (double-tap to the chest, not the face) as well as them falling in love.  Not sure the extra time actually adds to the film, but it's still damn good.

*******

That's about it from here.........oh!  Yesterday I saw a bunch of whales.  Mother and calf, plus a few stray bulls.  They looked quite happy and content (for whales) 

Ya'll be cool

Spanked

I'm sure the title of the post will draw some new readers.  Sorry to disappoint, but I was simply spanked by the third engineer in PING-PONG.  Bastardo beat me in two games straight, like 21-3 and 21-5.  The quarterfinals are a whole new level that I just don't exist on.  My bad back did not help, either.
****
Nothing much else happening, here.  Had meetings all morning, then paperwork from the meetings.  Just biding my time till crew-x, which is now in jeopardy (of course) due to some mechanical/ops issues.  Shee-it, it wouldn't be crew-x if it wasn't in danger of being canceled, or delayed.  Even if I do make it, I'm flying into Atlanta and it has a bad record of canceled flights/unable to land bullshit, for me. Would rather be coming into Newark, JFK, Dulles, Miami, Houston, or (please, someday!) direct to Minnie.  Seems the weather is always against me in Atlanta.  C'est La Vie... 

ouch

Spanked 0-2 in the first match of the ping-pong quarterfinals.  The old man is feeling............old.

Escape II

Was able to escape again, today.  Back out in the work boat for more underwater filming.  This time we filmed quite a bit, ass the water clarity was much better due to being much farther South of the Congo mouth.  Didn't see any mermaids, but the weather was right fucking beautiful as my limey buddies would say.

Die another little death

Reading the local paper, online, I see a headline that says a student at my son's university died in a car accident.  Passengers were hospitalized.  My heart stopped as I thought about how I haven't been able to get a response from my son via email, or his cell phone for the past few days.  It took me twenty minutes to choke down my fear and open the article to get the details.  Picked up and replaced the phone, a half-dozen times during those long minutes. 

It is never easy being a parent.  Never.

Comments

Caught this link from a Facebook comment, of all places.  Steph has funny friends!  Go check out the comments for the wolf shirt in the link.  Some of them are priceless.

*NSFW*  Naughty words, kids.

Great Day

Went out in the work boat this afternoon.  It was a bit rough, but we managed to do a little filming with the underwater camera.  It was just good to get off the ship and get some fresh air and sun.  Ended up a little seasick from looking down into the water and the camera monitor while bouncing around, but even puking beats flying a desk, any day.  Hope ya'll have a great day. 

Tomorrow is Middle Pirate's birthday, wish I was home for it.

Next up...one of LP's favorite movies

It may be a bit premature, as nothing is signed, sealed and delivered, but it looks like I'll be working in Madagascar next job:)  It's been a long seven months here off the coast of Angola and well, Madagascar sounds like the perfect place to go and forget all this West African nastiness. For those of you that don't know, a short history on the place:

• 160 million years ago - Madagascar is born as it separates from the African mainland
• 80 million years ago - Madagascar breaks away from India
• Around 2000 years ago - Madagascar settled by Indonesians or people of mixed Indonesian/African descent
• December 1894 - France invades Madagascar and takes the capital Tana on October 1, 1895. France loses only 20 men in battle during the campaign but more than 6,000 to disease
• 2005 The Pirate watches the movie and learns that lemurs come from Madagascar.
• June 26th, The Pirate learns he might work in Madagascar and looks up the capital city in the giant Atlas to find it's called Antananarivo, The city of one-thousand warriors and yells "Fuck me!  That's cool!"
  

Antananarivo, The city of one-thousand warriors takes its name from an episode in Malagasy history. When King Andrianjaka, who had called his people the Merina (That can be translated into highlanders) occupied the twelve sacred hills (Ambohitratrimo, Ambohimanga, Ilafy, Alasora, Antsahadita, Ambohimanambony, Antananarivo, Ambohitrabiby, Namehana, Ambohidrapeto, Ambohijafy, Ambohimandranjaka) upon which Analamanga (where the forest is blue) was built, he had his royal palace and stronghold erected. One thousand warriors were quartered there and he called this city Antananarivo. In those days, the Merinas were divided into three castes : Andriana (nobility), Hova (plebeians), and Andevo (labourers).  Nowadays, Antananarivo's population exceeds one million inhabitants and its urban area has considerably grown. Surrounded by vast plains used for rice cultivation, Antananarivo has a Mediterranean climate due to its geographic position (1,400m above sea level).

*All this Malagasy goodness comes from a plethora of sources across the wide-open plains of the wild and wonderful Internet.

 I'm going to have to watch the movie tonight, I guess.

Not your Facebook

Having a conversation about Facebook and other social networking sites today.  I noted that Facebook has a "friends" section, or list and wondering why they also don't have an "ex-friends" list, or "enemies".  You know, Cameron Pillowbiter has sent you an "Enemies" request, or Jason Jackass an "Eat Shit and Die" request.  Instead of sending your enemy a drink, you could send them a little, steaming pile of shit.  A "hate this" option under every post, that sort of thing.

Perhaps I should just start my own anti-social networking site like Fuckyoubook, or Hatester... 

Given the recent indiscretions of a certain politician who was oh so quick to crucify a certain past president for the same sort behavior, I could even start a special site just for politicians called HypocriteSpace, where they can dump on each other for taking bribes, screwing prostitutes, doing drugs, and whatnot until they get caught doing the same thing.   I bet you'd even get those bogus members, you know?  Prostitutes and lobbyists posing as fellow politicians, trying to get you to add them as friend, just so you'll visit their website and negotiate for a blow job, or a favorable vote on gun control.  You could allow them to form and join groups, just like Facebook; Vote Yourself a Larger Salary, Sell a Seat in Congress, What's Wrong With Breaking Campaign Promises?, High Priced Call Girl Lists For the State and Federal Elected, Proud To Be Corrupt, Great places to Get Away and Cheat on the Wife (The Argentina group won't be very popular) and Who Needs Morals? We were Elected. The possibilities are endless!

I think I'm on to something here...

To journey home

Flights for crew-x are out.  Bastards booked me 24 hours later than the rest of the crew and have me going through Charles Fucking De Gaul!  Worst airport in the world:(

Meat, it's whats for dinner

Wil Wheaton tweetpic:

MEAT LOVERS

Tuna and my bloated head

I know a guy named Tuna, not that it's relevant to anything, other than I am surrounded by tuna.

I watched the tuna schooling around the ship again, today.  They are a brilliant, electric silver-blue that looks fantastic in contrast to the deep blue of the ocean.  There are literally tens of thousands schooled up around the ship, endlessly cruising in a circle around the hull.

I've had this theory about my ability to sleep onboard and what affects it. One of the issues is incline.  NASA uses incline to study the effects of weightlessness.  I've checked the meters that track the pitch, roll and heave of the ship.  I'm sleeping head down at an average of 2-4 degrees.  A hard look at the drink dispenser in the mess confirms this-it has a clear, plastic reservoir that illustrates the pitch, roll and heave nicely, when filled with a colorful juice or whatnot.  Hard science, people.  The juice never lies.

Anyway, I think I need to switch my sleeping direction head to foot and alleviate the blood pooling in my head 4-5 hours/night. That cannot be good, can it?

A dab of politics, pinch of history and a dash of religion

Got this from a Senator John McCain Tweet: Obama's Persian Tutorial
It's a damn good read, no matter your opinions on the subject matter.

From here to there

I love this view. Want to be here...


View Larger Map

instead of here.


View Larger Map

Interesting to note from the undersea formation trending from/to the mouth of the Congo, it seems the origin of the river might be tectonic in nature, somehow.

Old man wakes up feeling like death from simply playing 4 games of table tennis

The old man is being very quiet about his wins last night and hoping that he can think of an excuse to not play any tourney matches today.

I feel so bad I'm putting creamer in my coffee for the first time in 35 years.  No, I don't count Baileys as creamer, thank you very much.

Old man takes four in a row! Kids are stunned...

Pummeled victim number two after a quick smoke. These kids are no match for the fat, old smoker. Took the punk in straight sets 21-9, 21-6.

The Pirate is up 2-0...

Time to retire to the sauna.  Smoked my first opponent in the table tennis tourney in straight sets of 21-10, 21-18.  Rubber match my ass.  He was a 24 yr old Chinese kid who held the paddle like backwards, or upside down?   Everybody said the professionals do that, so I tried the same thing.  It worked *shrugs*


OK, I AM sweating like a pig and wheezing like a steam locomotive, though.  This ping pong is NOT for old people...and only five more opponents to go.

where I'm at today

My thoughts tend toward my children, today.  Wish I could see them. 

Happy fathers day to dads everywhere, especially those serving away from home and their children.

Normalcy is not not normal

I've not had a "normal" trip offshore in a long, long time.  I'd forgotten what they're like and in some sort of twisted alter-reality, I find that I don't like it when I don't have multi-million dollar disasters hanging over my head.  I sort of miss the pressure, damn me for a fool.  I also intensely dislike the paperwork, administration, etc., that I have been able to blow off for so long now.  It all makes you feel like a stuffed suit, dancing for the organ grinder back on the beach.  I am up to my ears in procedures, policies, instructions, lists and reports and it's a little mind-numbing, not to mention borrrr-ring. 

However, it's nice to work less than 18 hr shifts and have the energy and time to work out and sauna.  Today I begin the first round (and last for me-I suk) of the ping-pong tournament.  There's a $100 prize up for grabs, but I suspect that one of the many Asian fellows on here is going to kick the shit out of everybody, unless a certain Frenchman can hold his own.  Me, I'll retire to the sauna and get the results in the morning;)

Bomb goes boom

Saturday in Angola. Good times.  ISPS (international ship & port safety) drill.  This time it was a bomb, hidden somewhere onboard.  Naturally, we have to go find and disable it.  Common sense, right?  I mean, if you know you have a bomb onboard, don't immediately make like a hockey player and get the puck out.  No.  We've all seen bombs in the movies, so get out there and cut the red wire, not the blue one.  It always helps to carry a pair of tweezers and a pair of small snips, btw.  And pay no attention to the increasing tempo of the background music-it will stop suddenly when you cut the wire.

Dressed to kill in bright orange, we scoured the ship and eventually found the bomb.  It was an IED located in the hospital-inhuman bastardo terrorists tried to blow up the freaking hospital.  Well, maybe they actually know the medic and then things begin to make more sense...

Anyway, the medic found and disabled the device, so we could head down to the mess and a snack, while watching a particularly gripping presentation on the new version of the ISPS code.  Like I said, good times.

And how was your day?

Save a fly

This is a fine example of why I think PETA are a bunch of idiots.

A Michigan amusement park to aviod

Visited this place a few years back and had a nice time.  Won't be going back.  Ever.

Beginning of the end

Unpacked the rest of my shit this morning and then promptly selected my flights home.  I LOVE these short trips.

Just went topside to have a smoke and catch some rays.  Leaning on the railing, I noticed we are being shadowed by a rather large school of tuna.  Looks like sashimi for dinner.

Temperature is down.  Only a comfortable 80, or so.  Nice change from Africa hot.

Got my old cabin back this trip.  I've been in 3 others during the last three trips.   Every time I head off to my cabin, I wander down a random companionway, forgetting where I'm sleeping.  I have to stand there and think about it.  Woke up this morning totally disoriented.  At first I didn't know where in the world I was, then as I walked out I thought I was in one of my other cabins and went the wrong way toward the instrument room.  Whoops.

Entered the ship's ping-pong tournament despite not being able to play worth a damn.  Figure I'll give the rest of the crew some entertainment.  I'm nice like that...

Saw some kids back home got busted for trying to smuggle some drugs to an inmate in the local prison camp.  Haven't kids today heard of keistering and keeping your mouth shut?   I guess as a society, we're just not teaching our kids the life skills necessary to make in the world.  Damn sure MY kids would do a better job of it if I get sent up.

miles and miles

Have you ever used Microsoft Project?  How about the online project server crap to share a project interactively with others?  I am trying to complete a setup using both and it is killing me.  Buggy-ass shit with lousy documentation:(

On the bright side I've now added another 10 TB of disk space and a couple of file servers to my system and I LOVE the extra space!   I feel like getting inside that space and dancing a jig:)  Too bad it will be all used up in another couple days...

That Dude asked if I get frequent flier miles.  Yes, many.  On many different programs and airlines.  I haven't bothered to join all programs/airlines because, frankly, after traveling for work I have no fucking desire to go anywhere that requires flying and airports/Montezuma's revenge/hotels/buses/bad food/rickshaws/luggage/trains/helicopters/standing in line/ships/ignorant fucks/sampans/dugout canoes.  Soooo, I collect miles from a few programs that I think PW and the kids might use and that's about it.

I once tried to calculate how many million miles I have flown and it quickly got depressing.  Too damn many is the answer.

I happen to know where the geographic opposite to my home is on the other side of the planet.  I've been pretty damn close to it.  More useless information...

Day 3

Well I'm all settled in on the ship, now.  I've been pretty sick since arriving in Luanda, but felt better this morning when I awoke.  Yesterday was kind of a blur-did very little other than begin training the new guy and attending a fire drill.  Still need to finish unpacking and then dive into work.  My other employee has been taking care of the work and completing an upgrade to our computer system and thankfully, has done a bang-up job.   We had a serious injury yesterday-one of the guys got a huge fishhook embedded in his thumb, requiring the medic to operate to remove it.  That's the price we have to pay for sashimi and I for one, am willing to pay it.  We lost a 4-foot yellow fin tuna, yesterday, too.  Hopefully, that is a sign of the tuna to come!

Back in the saddle

I'm back in my office chair.  You all know the sagas and stories to get here-it was all the same, a lousy 4 1/2 day commute.  Arrived here dead tired and sick. Think I ate some bad shit on one of the flights.

Highlights of the trip. 

Flying from Minnie to London with some lady and her kid next to me.  They ended up; her head on my shoulder, his head in my arm pit, drooling on my lap (him, not her).  They woke up after a few hours (I was half out of it, vegetating in my headphones and could've cared less) and she was mortified.  He decided we were now buddies and kept poking me when I wasn't looking.

Walking in a half-hour circle in London Heathrow, twice.

Trying to sleep on the freezing granite floor in Heathrow, hoping for a quick catnap-NOT.

Getting a business class seat while everyone else from 4 different ships (not just mine) was seated in cattle class.  I razzed them pretty good, but one guy got me back by sneaking in and whacking me on the head every time he got up to pee.  He pees a lot...

Stopping to rap with the Bose kiosk guy in Minnie.  He offered me 200 bucks for my 300 dollar, 5 yr old, broken QC2's.  YES!  Picked up the 350 dollar QC3's for a lousy 150.   Love the on-ear, smaller, lighter, rechargeable next generation phones.  They rock and after about 35 hours of playing, have yet to wear out the supposedly 25 hour battery.

Finding out my buddy got deported from Angola for the wrong stamp in his passport.  I have the same stamp...

Spending only 2 hours in the cage this time around!

Traveling 12,000 miles and 4 1/2 days, only to find out the Wings fucking lost.

Hearing rumors of my next job possibly being Columbia, or Peru-two places I've not yet worked.  Panama Canal, here I come...

Leaving on a jet plane...

It's that day, again.  Crew-x.  Heading back to Angola today.  I've been sick for the last two days and nothing is done.  Soooo, I've got a ton of things to do to get ready for work.  I hate these days:(   I still need to pack, charge batteries, print out the legal docs for Angola as well as handover notes and get my ass over to Mr. Budd's to grab some mp4's and DVD's.  Packing is the worst, though.  Once again, I have to figure out how to pack up my whole life in one, soft bag that weighs less than 7 KG's.

A day in town

Cool and misty today.  Almost raining.   Took LP to school for her last half day, then picked her up for some father/daughter time.  We went shopping, checking out jewelry and canoes, then I got a quick haircut.  After that, we braved the downtown construction to hit the Chinese restaurant.  I had spicy, sesame chicken, she had crab rangoons and satay pork.  Before heading to the chiropractor, we stopped at Pete's so LP could see the great, spiral staircase stringer.  She was duly impressed and wants to see the changes inside, too:)  I got a GREAT adjustment and he noted that my shit was way twisted and tight as a snare drum.  We also bought LP a half dozen chapter books.  Looks like a night's reading for her-she is finishing the first book right now.  Tells me she's on page 62 after less than an hour's reading.  She takes after me and it looks like her reading addiction is going to get expensive.  That's about it.  We're home and it sucks outside so I'm off to do a little crew-x paperwork and maybe take a nap...

Slash and burn

Spent the day slashing and burning the back 40.  Did it all by hand and I am one sore bastard.  PW too, is down for the count.  We are nearly ready for fill dirt, though.  Just need to take out a few stumps and one more day of burning.  Please let me find somebody who wants to dump free fill dirt here...

The end is near...

Sitting in the back yard burning brush.  Just got my flights for the upcoming crew-x.  Gonna miss this place.

Fire pit

Last couple days have been good weather-warm and fairly sunny.  Yesterday, I burned scrap wood and brush in the back of my property for about 6-7 hours, then spent half the night trying to get the coals out.  I was actually out in the back spraying the fire pit with a hose at 2am, in my pj's.  While I was burning in the back yard, my dog was shitting in the dining room.   He's sick.  He's had to go out to crap about 30 times in the last 2 days.  Good dog that he is, he runs over to the neighbors and shits his brains out...

Today I cut up more scrap for the fire pit and wisely kept the dog out with me.  Highlight of the day was a full mug of coffee dumping into my laptop.  I took it apart, wiped it down, shook it out and left it apart for about 10 hours.  Put it back together tonight and it works fine...

Tomorrow? More yard work and maybe I'll take LP out for a bike ride.  Crew-x is looming.

The doors of perception

It was surreal.  A 300 ft hallway with 150 doors in it.  A hallway full of doors.  Only 3 led anywhere.  One at each end went into rooms and one in the middle, led outdoors.  the rest were stacked against the walls of this abnormally long hallway to nowhere, in an old hospital.  My task today was to load these doors into my pickup and take them to a concession stand in a park, stacking them in the backroom.  Each door was custom decorated by someone in the community and generally featured somebody's grandmother.  So I carried doors with old ladies on them all day.  It was slightly more than weird.  A kid from my alma mater and Mr. Budd's oldest boy helped me.  When it was over, this artist lady fed us pizza and pop in the park.  It was just a strange day.

Afterward, we dropped off PW at home and I let LP drive me around in the woods for an hour.  She drives like a maniac, but I suppose if you give a seven yr-old free reign with a two-ton pickup, she's bound to go a little crazy.

The continuing voyages...

Replaced the broken mirror on my pickup, today.  Thank you Mr. Budd-it took me a fair bit to get around to it, but I finally did and I'm glad I waited till it was hot out.  Had to glue the trim piece on.  Also had to pry off the inside door panel and that would've shattered in the cold for sure.

Also managed to haul off all the scrap metal that's accumulated around the yard, including the cast-iron tub, which was one heavy bastard to get into the truck.  Got five bucks for it at the scrap yard.

Tonight my son called and asked if I wanted to watch the new Star Trek movie with him.  I heard it was good, but as a die-hard trekkie I had a few reservations, among them, different actors for the crew and an ingrained fear of continuity loss.  This last bit is unique to Star Trek, in that all good fans know the universe, it's timeline and the fact that any storyline is constrained by what has come before as well as what is yet to come.  In this, I was not disappointed, as JJ Abrams and Co used a classic ST workaround.  The only thing I was a bit dissapointed in was that they left the door open so that a sequal would not be constrained.  However, all in all it was a fast-paced, rollicking good old Star Trek ride and I loved it.  Oh yeah, and the new actors?  Not bad.

Ended the night writing this with a glass of milk and a few, blue oreos.  No milk at sea, you know?

BLC

Slept in today.  Glorious.  Heading out for Spring cleaning in the yard after a couple of bacon, lettuce and cheese sandwiches.  Tons of scrap metal to get rid of, but I happen to have a scrap yard right around the corner:)  Bought a new fitting for pumping up tires.  Opened it up today and found it's a piece of shit and of course made in China.  Fucking HATE Wally World!

Home again

Today is Memorial Day.  It was first enacted to honor Union soldiers fallen in the Civil War.  Formerly known as Decoration Day, it was expanded to include our fallen heroes from all wars, after WWI.  Please say a prayer for them and keep those still serving in your thoughts and prayers as well.

Had a wonderful weekend with LL and the Budd clan.  Waterfalls, music, good food, kids and some much-needed peace.  Even saw a familiar face from 14 years ago.  It was a grand time on the North shore of Lake Superior.  Stopped for fast food on the way home which was a bad move.  LP ended up sick, almost puking.  Both PW and I feel the same.  Oddly enough it was the dog who blew chunks, spewing some pretty foul shit in the mud room.  I managed to not do the same while scooping it up. Guess he had a rough weekend while we were away??

Just now I watched Deadliest Catch where a boat sank, loosing 7 guys.  Kind of knocked me down a peg, reminding me of the choices I've made and a former crew member recently lost at sea.

Still, it's good to be home and we had a weekend to remember.  I'm tired and a bit queasy, but quite happy. Take care, people.

Vacation

Off to the Great North Woods with Mr. Budd and LL and a passel of kids.  Hope ya'll have a great Memorial Day weekend!

Peace

An excellent adjustment

Today PW and I got his and hers adjustments at the Chiropractor.  Awesome.  He twisted me up like a pretzel, crushed my lower back and then knuckled the shit out of my fucked up neck.  I feel pretty damn good and PW reports the same.  PW made a killer roast beast for dinner and I've been watching UFC's Ultimate Knockouts for an hour and half.  Good fight at nine, too!

Also starting to make plans and talk about the upcoming weekend with Mr. Budd and LL.   Oooh, sweet vacation!

Dinner with the boys

Tried to fix our busted washing machine.  Despite this machine being the second time I've had this model and despite fixing it and it's predecessor several times, I could not figure out what was wrong.  Not to be outsmarted, I whipped out washer number three.  Yep, I had a spare washing machine-same make and model. Best to be prepared...

Had the Budd boys over for dinner.  Burgers on the grill, PW's famous tuna slad, corn on  the cob and baked beans.  Pigged out and then took a couple of muscle relaxers for a bad kink in my neck.  I'm fading fast...

Home again, but where's Spring?

So, I'm home.  It's fucking snowing.  Snowing.  I just left Africa and now it's snowing.  I'm not excited.

It is, however, good to be home.  Snuggling with PW and LP, a blazing wood stove, walking in the woods and coffee with Mr. Budd after dropping LP off at school.  I really missed home.  Next weekend it's off to hang in the woods with Mr. Budd, LL and companies.  Going to have to stock up on several bottles of Baileys, again:)

HOME!

Sorry folks.  I made it home two days ago, but I've been a bit under the weather since getting home.  I wrote this along the way:


I've made it to Amsterdam and found a comfortable seat in the Internet lounge, but not logged in-too damned expensive here.

Crew-x was a bit different this time right from the beginning.  We used the jet-powered rescue craft to transfer people from my ship to a waiting supply boat.  It's rigged with container accomadations on the back deck and they have some small comforts for us to while away the hours with; movies, wii and a small billiards table made out of plywood-even the balls are plywood disks and the sticks are old mop handles.  What a glamorous life I lead.  Sleeping in a steel box and playing plywood pool:)

The 24-hr trip into Luanda, Angola was largely uneventful.  I slept a fair bit, though fitfully with 8 other guys tromping in and out, slamming doors, climbing to the top bunks, snoring and breaking wind as us sailors do.  Mostly I read a couple books and paced the back deck, or sat around telling stories in the mess while drinking too much instant coffee.

Arriving in port, in Luanda, they only kept us in the cage for a couple of hours.  It was still long with no tire swing, wheel to run on, nor a water bottle hanging down from the side.

Leaving the cage, we drove through and around Luanda.  I wish I could convey the wreck and ruin I see every time I am there.  It is astounding and horrifying at the same time.  This time, we drove South along the harbor, then around to the East behind the embassy hill.  I saw much of this same scenery on the way in nearly six weeks ago, but it was still fascinating.  Instead of heading straight East up the bluffs toward the airport, we skirted the South end of town to a private guest house, supposedly just a few minutes drive from the airport.

This place was walled off with armed guards and boasted it's own generator, to avoid the frequent and long brownouts that plague the rest of the city.  It was very clean, spartan and quiet.  One of the crew this time was living in Luanda and had a car.  He took a few people down the road to grab a couple hundred bucks worth of beer, olives and something that looked like chips, called "Salty Cracks".  Lots of drunken jokes followed this revelation.  Anyway, about 10 of us sat in the courtyard next to the meat freezer, where the manager/camp counselor let us store the beer and managed to get pretty damn drunk over about 4 hours.  Had a grand time except for the Chief Gunner stealing my shoes, shirt and glasses left on the table when I split to shower.  Just before leaving we were given great tubs of soft rolls, salami and bananas for a quick meal.

While lazily boarding the bus for the airport, I got a call from the shore agent, screaming in a panic that the traffic was bad and we were going to miss our flight out.  Figured him for a git, but rousted the others (running up and down the hallways yelling for the other guys to get a fucking move on, much to the dismay of the manager and other guests).  In less than 10 minutes on the road, we realized he was right.  The seven-minute ride took us 2 agonizing hours, of stop and go, potholes, fender-benders and stalled cars.  It was a nightmare.  Especially drunk.  imagine being drunk on bus where the driver SLAMS on the breaks every 10-30 seconds, for two hours.  I felt like a pool ball and thought for sure I was going to piss myself the last half-hour.

We made the airport and I was the last one on the A-300 bound for Frankfurt.  We barely made it and Immigration was a PAIN IN THE ASS this time.  The only bright spots were running into some guys from one of my old ops, back in the GoM and then managing to slip around the line for the guy with rubber gloves who wants to see if you're keistering any Angolan currency.  I DO NOT LIKE THIS GUY.  Big fingers and a bad attitude...

Flight to Frankfurt sucked.  Food sucked.  No sleep, bad fucking hangover.

We also landed late and I missed my connection to Amsterdam.  Lufthansa re-booked me on a later flight and I re-booked my KLM flights back to the states once I got here to Amsterdam.

So, I bolted into town to take in a little of the local flavor and then caught the express train back here to the airport.  I've got just enough time to close this out, catch a smoke and get to the other terminal and my gate.  Unfortunately, I won't get in till midnight tonight and I've already been up more than 24.  Good times.

Well, I'm just about to land in Minnie.  As usual, Northwest's food and service both leave something to be desired.  US carriers are cheap-ass mother fuckers when compared to the rest of the world-at least in food and service.

I've got 5 hours in Minnie and not a clue as to what I'm going to do.  Maybe the Mall of America?

Minnie was boring, I stayed in the airport, had a meal, read a book and walked a lot.   My flight was delayed an hour d/t mechanical problems and finally, long after midnight, Mr. Bud kindly picked me up and drove me home to PW and LP.  

I've been sick on and off for two days, I think, due to the malaria medicine I have to take, but I refuse to let it take me out.  Looking forward to the weekend!

Bound for home

I'm outta here in less than an hour.  24 hours back to Luanda, then another 24 to get back across the pond and back home.

Peace

Flooding onboard-SAVE MY LAPTOP!

One of the things I never expected to see while sitting at my computer here on the ship was a wave.  You see, I cannot see outside from where I sit.  However, tonight I saw a wave roll past my workstation.  We flooded.  Mind you, we're sitting here with millions of dollars in computer equipment and a wave of water rolled into the room.  For a moment, nobody even moved we were so stunned.  I've ridden out many a hurricane and never once saw water come into the instrument room, but today, in a small rain squall and marginal seas, we took on a shitload of water.  Soooo, we've spent the last 3 hours mopping, wet-vaccing, unplugging pipes, drying off wires and cables, boxes of equipment, etc.  I've said before that if you're out here long enough, nothing really surprises you anymore.  I guess I was wrong.

Robert Plant is not a mixer and Alison Krauss a bowl

Less than 24 to go.  I hope.  No word on my oppo and whether or not he has been deported, etc.

Been a shit trip and I am ready to get the hell outta Dodge.

The only high point was yesterday coming across some new music.  Grabbed a few tidbits like Deep Purple live on the King Biscuit Flour Hour (remember THAT shit?), but I also snagged a real gem that I've been looking for and this ought to make Mr Bud happy- ROBERT PLANT/ALISON KRAUSS-RAISING SAND.  Ooooh, man is it good.  Listening to it right now.  All I need is something to convert it from MA4 (Fucking Itunes) to MP3 so I can add it to my Windows Media Player and not have to use VLC.  VLC is great for movies and while it's better than Apple Quicktime, it's sound quality leaves something to be desired.

Anyway, for anyone living in a cave who hasn't heard this album, or seen the video-you gotta get you some.

Speaking of music, I've discovered my musical taste is either very ecclectic, or very poor.  Yesterday I head down to the mess and grab a bite to eat.  Sitting at a table, I can hear music playing in the galley-the galley staff usually has something cranked up.  I can't hear it well, but the drums are great.  Rockin beat and I spend 10 minutes tapping away to the drums while I chow down.  Finally, I get up and make my way to the galley to dump my plate.  There is no music- only the giant, commercial mixer running and banging away on a metal bowl...

Notice

While I'm having a crap day I thought I'd relate some things posted on my ship's notice board:



1.  Notice: Due to how difficult it is to get off this ship, if you are taking medication, bring enough to last TWO trips.  (hoo boy, does that suck)

2. News article from Angola: Angolan children being eaten by crocodiles...

NOTE:  LL- STOP!    DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER!!!!!




















3. News Article from Australia: Eaten Alive!  Mice chew war vet's head. (I really hope you stopped...)

Normally, it's a pretty benign notice board, but now it really catches your eye as you walk by on the way to the mess.  I prefer the old, boring notice board...

In which I don another hat

One of the guys on here is getting off today to attend a course (unlike me who had to stay on two weeks ago!!!!) and I have taken over his job, in addition to mine.  In some things, he answers to me and in others, I answer to him.  I am now thoroughly confused and fighting with myself over all things.  There is the hope that his regular relief will show in two days.  Otherwise I may end up murdering myself over his job, or mine-I'm not quite sure, yet.

Blowing dead monkeys

Shite.

Even after an unexpected, extra two weeks and while facing a possible several MORE weeks out here, I just found out that even if I get off on time, I won't get off on time, but at least a day late, maybe two.  Can you even follow that?   I can't.

Sometimes this business is an almighty pain in the fucking ass. 

And

West Africa blows dead monkeys.

Small town

You know you live in a small town when your local paper's headline is that some guy remodeled his kitchen.

That's not my hometown, but it's close enough to give me a chuckle.  My town is too small to have a paper.  In fact, it's too small to be a town and is actually just a village, so maybe I shouldn't be laughing at them...

Rumors

The rumor mill will grind whatever grist required and as we approach our final days of the trip, it would seem we are that grist.  Word has it that a competitor's ship just attempted a crew-x and half the oncoming crew was deported for a particular situation that OUR oncoming crew also faces.  Trouble on the horizon...

That was the icing on today's cake.  The cake itself was working 9 rather shitty hours before PW, LP and MP called to remind me it was my birthday.  How does one forget things like one's own birthday?

I need to get out of here.

Stowaway! (part 2)

Life goes on, much as it always does out here.  A phone call told me PW, LP and MP have gone off on vacation for the weekend.  No word on what happened to The Pirate Dog, henceforth known as PD.  We continue to watch the swine flu soap opera from afar and are preparing for our oncoming crew by setting out hand sanitizing lotion, so they don't infect us when they arrive.

Today, we had a second stowaway drill.  We were given a second chance to find the little bastard who remained hidden for an hour an half, until we were forced to give up and beg him to come out over the ship's intercom.  This time, we nailed him in eleven minutes.  He was found hiding inside a box in our dry stores.  Didn't stop me from climbing all over the ship, sweating my ass off in the African heat, however.

We officially talked about crew-x.  So far, no word that our opposites are going to make it, or if they will sit home an extra two weeks as we did last month...

Bigger, faster, better

I want one of these for work!!!!

Currently, I utilize (28) dual-core 1.3 GhZ 466  parallel nodes that feed the binary bits and bobs to about 20TB of raid disk

This prick boasts 181,504 AMD Opteron cores in 26,604 nodes and hits a top end of 4 teraflops, or 54 trillion mathematical calculations per second, placing the Oak Ridge (TN) Cray XT among the most powerful open scientific systems in the world.  It's got over 300 Terabytes memory and 10,750 Terabytes disk space. 

It even runs under SuSE Linux and has a cool mural on the blade cabinets...

Holy crap, I am in love.