Saturday, January 5, 2008

Ornery Bastard

The average age of the crew on here is about 24, maybe slightly younger. Couple that with dozens of Aussies and Kiwis and I find the sense of humor and atmosphere to be quite different from my last operation-a boat full of aging, silver-haired Americans. For instance, on my last operation, if somebody's birthday was discovered to fall during a trip (most were kept close to the vest), you might wish the poor bastard a happy birthday and at most a prankster might quietly slip a bottle of Maalox, or a tube of hemorrhoid cream onto his workstation.

Here, some bright-eyed trainee paints a fucking mural on the notice board outside the mess. Additional assholes put up an electronic card that looks like a car, honks and plays happy birthday whenever ALL the other trainees push the hood every fucking time they pass by it while I'm trying to eat a quiet meal and think of a place, any place, other than this. Oh and one of those goofy looking party hats that resembles one of Madonna's tits back in the 90's. Remember the pointy, leather bustier. Yeah, they expect you to walk around for 12 hours looking like you have Madonna's bustier on your head. We've had several birthdays and the younger people DO wear the damn thing.

I've noticed the music sucks the sweat off a dead skunk, too. A lot of European techno shite and the worst of the worst pop-crap like Brittany Spears (I had to ask someone, "what's this shit?" and now I can finally say I've heard Brittany Spears and hate her music) and the Spice Girls (same story-now I've heard them and they blow). Thank God I've got my headphones. Otherwise, by now I would have spooned somebody's eyes out and had them with afternoon tea. JUST NOW, I swear, just now, Smells like Teen Spirit, by Nirvana came on and I was gonna say that after 3 weeks somebody finally played a tune that hasn't ever been heard at the annual Cream party in Ibiza. (I fucking HATE drum machines and some parents should make like gerbils and eat their young) Anyway, they skipped the Nirvana 10 seconds after it came on. Fucking gerbils.

Is that harsh? I can't wear my headphones right now because I have to keep getting up and change data tapes in another room-thus the rage as I hear the 34th version of exactly the same beat. The day a decent classic rock song debuts in here Iguanas will fall from the trees. Yes, Steph, I've latched on to that phrase and I like it!

So, that's about it from 46 degrees South. It's still windy, with heavy seas, work is a pain in the ass and I'm an ornery bastard.


Fyremandoug said...

You can always get your Mystical Potato Head Groove Thing on BABY.

turn old Joe up and rock out with your ---- out

The Pirate said...

Was doin the Mystical Potato Head Groove thing just last night:) Joe rocks.

LeeAnn said...

Just be thankful they aren't play rap-crap.

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