Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Journal Adrift

A pirate's daily journal:


Drank 3 pots of coffee this morning.
We are currently adrift.
I saw a BIG fucking shark with a black-tipped dorsal fin and a very pointy snout. Approximately 10 ft in length. Mako?
A barracuda hangs out at the stern, like a hood on a street corner. He barely moves and looks pissed off.
The seas are nearly glassy with a gentle swell. No wind and it is HOT.
The satellite connection is very, very slow. We are alone, the other ships in the fleet have left us for port.
Conversation was lively for the first two hours of shift. Now we ignore each other. Tired of surfing after an hour. Go vote for the Queen on Blogger Idol over at Greg O'Commentwhore on April 09. While you're there, poke around-the dude is drop-dead funny. I know, it's a week away, but fuck, I don't have much today. Go there anyway. The last interesting thing I read was that Keith Richards snorted his father, mixed with a little blow.
The other pirates are in a daze. Nobody even noticed that New Kids on The Block was on the stereo till I got up, swearing and yelling. WTF?
XM radio sucks. Really. It is useless. Even the Boneyard plays the same Metallica, over and over. Fred and Ethel are just as bad. Top Tracks? Forget it. Deep Tracks? No way.
My sanity is hanging on by a thread. The thread is the totally hiarious 48 emails I recieved so far today from my fellow FTTW writers and editors. Some days they generate over 100 and the shit is REALLY funny. Hell, I'm a captive audience on days like today. Last night I watched the second half of The Illusionist. It was an excellent movie and I would recommend it.
Three days ago, my oppo discoved that the software we use to work our magic has an option to create a blog for each project. We started a work blog and I am both entertained and horrified by the thought that I now write for a work blog. It is handy, though. I can't say FUCK in it, though. Fuck.
I peed off the stern of the ship today. I tried to hit the barracuda. He is now waiting for me to fall overboard.
I have been daydreaming about dinner. Last night's ahi tuna was fucking brilliant with a teriaki ginger sauce, garnished with red peppers, mango and scallions. I had a side of rare, fillet mignon, too. yummy.


Blondie said...

3 pots of coffee? Did the toilet survive? OK, yeah, had to go there. :) :) :)

Pirate said...

You missed it. I've been peeing off the stern, trying to get the barracuda who now hates me.

Queen of Dysfunction said...

Do you have a camera? Can you get a photo of the barracuda giving you "the fin" for peeing on him?

Pirate said...

I DID bring a camera this trip. I'll get a shot of him, tomorrow, if he's still waiting for me to fall in.

LeeAnn said...

With all of that good food you are being serviced don't roll of the deck!

Blondie said...

I wasn't talking about pee.

Pirate said...

:) yup, it DID survive that.

Blondie said...


Macoosh said...

i was amazed pirate, that you didn't get her gist the first time!!! :)

i want to be a pirate...i want to pee off the stern.